hi friends! i've been working more lately, and it's been all-consuming. i miss my blog friends and i need to do better!
after experiencing more disordered eating and the accompanying misery, i started working a lot more. i was sick for a week and a half, and worked more during that time, too! so i have been really out of touch. aside from playing games on facebook and checking on friends there, i have chosen to isolate myself a wee bit. but i'm working on things, and also working at my job quite a bit, so i have excuses galore :p
we put up our christmas tree last friday, it's wonderful! i'm really enjoying the season. had our own thanksgiving on saturday with my sister and a another friend in attendance. needing to dedicate myself to more christmas gift shopping in the immediate future!
unfortunately, wes is sick now. he made it through deer season without getting ill, but despite my best efforts he finally got it. so we'll work on that and hopefully he can make it through his work week too. it wasn't the flu because there weren't any fevers, but we were both really sick! the kind where you feel like you're walking chin deep in water and achy and all that lovely stuff.
best wishes to all, i hope everyone is enjoying the holiday season as much as i am! i think we all truly have a lot to be thankful for. i'm thankful to have such wonderful friends.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
funny walmart shoppers...
this week i work mornings and days instead of my usual night owl routine, and it is a refreshing shot of variety but also nerves because i'm a little lost when out of my element.
apparently i've been missing out on very many unique "regulars" of the deli department! the evening customer just isn't quite the same. this morning i had the pleasure of meeting one of them; an elderly man who is quite hard of hearing and apparently likes to wear a trapper hat with a chunk of fake fur taped to it.
he needed some "mouse cheese". is it sad that i knew that he probably meant swiss?
:P
apparently i've been missing out on very many unique "regulars" of the deli department! the evening customer just isn't quite the same. this morning i had the pleasure of meeting one of them; an elderly man who is quite hard of hearing and apparently likes to wear a trapper hat with a chunk of fake fur taped to it.
he needed some "mouse cheese". is it sad that i knew that he probably meant swiss?
:P
list of things i've been wanting to do for ages but have postponed
DISCLAIMER DU JOUR: i'm trying to get better at making "lists." my lists are too wordy. when i send people text messages, they are usually 2 "pages" long, and very often 3. i suppose cutting down on cluttery words should also be on this list.....but look how many sentences i used just to say that.
1) visit my mcdonald's family. the reason for putting this off is that i know from experience that there's no time for them to sit around and chitchat with me if i pop in for a visit. i see some of them on occasion, but it is very seldom. i have so much love in my heart for a lot of them and miss them dearly.
2) CRAFT PROJECTS. beading/beadwork/jewelry-making, painting, sewing....these are all things i used to do for years when i was sick. i bought a variety of beads about 2 YEARS ago and still have yet to resume the hobby. bought specific fabric for making a specific purse about 4 months ago and still haven't made it. i think i just get burned out on discipline. i discipline myself on the important things and it saps the energy out of me, leaving little discipline for pasttimes. plus it seems counterproductive to force myself into a regime of something that's supposed to be creative, free-flowing, and soothing! that goes for blogging, too.
i desperately want to make bethany a handmade baby gift!!!
3) movie-watching! we buy movies from amazon when there are deals, and also from entertainmart in springfield (used movies/games/cds), and they sit on the shelves for sometimes months before i get around to watching them. most recently, we got "revolutionary road" and "the reader". i have yet to dedicate the time to watching them although i would like to!
4) making photo albums
5) seeing a genius idea for a halloween costume come to fruition :p
1) visit my mcdonald's family. the reason for putting this off is that i know from experience that there's no time for them to sit around and chitchat with me if i pop in for a visit. i see some of them on occasion, but it is very seldom. i have so much love in my heart for a lot of them and miss them dearly.
2) CRAFT PROJECTS. beading/beadwork/jewelry-making, painting, sewing....these are all things i used to do for years when i was sick. i bought a variety of beads about 2 YEARS ago and still have yet to resume the hobby. bought specific fabric for making a specific purse about 4 months ago and still haven't made it. i think i just get burned out on discipline. i discipline myself on the important things and it saps the energy out of me, leaving little discipline for pasttimes. plus it seems counterproductive to force myself into a regime of something that's supposed to be creative, free-flowing, and soothing! that goes for blogging, too.
i desperately want to make bethany a handmade baby gift!!!
3) movie-watching! we buy movies from amazon when there are deals, and also from entertainmart in springfield (used movies/games/cds), and they sit on the shelves for sometimes months before i get around to watching them. most recently, we got "revolutionary road" and "the reader". i have yet to dedicate the time to watching them although i would like to!
4) making photo albums
5) seeing a genius idea for a halloween costume come to fruition :p
Sunday, September 13, 2009
I GOT A NEW CAR!!!!!!!!
we bought a new car yesterday. it is a 2009 pontiac g6 with a small number of miles on it.
we bought it outright, so it is kind of emotional to clear out my savings from 2 years of working at mcdonald's and walmart. but that's why i worked, and why i rode a bicycle in the snow and rain. we went in halfsies on it, so although it is "my car" it is ours. glad we won't have to worry about payments.
it's really big, comfy, safe, sporty and snazzy enough that wes loves it too. plus i got my 4 doors that i wanted :)
due to my rather unorthodox situation, this is a HUGE deal for me. (as it would be for anyone i suppose.) i will be able to practice driving and get my license in hopefully no time. can't wait. wes has helped me learn how to do so many normal things, and this is a biggie. kind of the culmination of 2 years +.
i have been terrified lately of seeing a few autumn leaves and thinking about football and seeing halloween decorations for sale. while i love all those things dearly, i've been in a panic about having to ride my bike to work in all kinds of weather again this year. so today i have felt a sense of relief about it. plus i've been able to enjoy football festivities :D
very grateful for my life and love.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
vacations i would love to take...
i've wanted to take a trip to new orleans for several years now, mostly since hurricane katrina. i love the cajun and french and old south cultures, and there are so many sights to see there. would be a grand road trip!!!!
any one of several national parks. i'm not big on really commercial sight-seeing, so hiking and just the raw, unadulterated nature experience would be so amazing!
seattle washington, to see the city and music-related sights. i've always admired the pacific northwest.
washington, dc. the only trip i've ever taken. VERY life-altering for me! i went in the summer of 2000. i think wes would love the creepy history stuff too. it's a very beautiful area, just an added bonus.
i've never had much of an affinity towards beaches or tropical places. granted, i've never been there, but i tend more towards the rustic stuff i think... oh, and not just because people don't wear bathing suits in the woods, although not having to worry about that is always an added bonus :P
i have to admit, i am one of those goofy people who would love to travel the country in an rv with my sweetie. maybe even live in one. that or a vw bus ;) i'm sure i haven't thought this through sufficiently, haha! thankfully wes says it's a no-go.
most of all, i would love to take a trip up to st. james to spend a good chunk of time with my mom and brother (preferably with wes and my sister there too). i miss them a lot, and i miss the dogs and the farm and everything.
any one of several national parks. i'm not big on really commercial sight-seeing, so hiking and just the raw, unadulterated nature experience would be so amazing!
seattle washington, to see the city and music-related sights. i've always admired the pacific northwest.
washington, dc. the only trip i've ever taken. VERY life-altering for me! i went in the summer of 2000. i think wes would love the creepy history stuff too. it's a very beautiful area, just an added bonus.
i've never had much of an affinity towards beaches or tropical places. granted, i've never been there, but i tend more towards the rustic stuff i think... oh, and not just because people don't wear bathing suits in the woods, although not having to worry about that is always an added bonus :P
i have to admit, i am one of those goofy people who would love to travel the country in an rv with my sweetie. maybe even live in one. that or a vw bus ;) i'm sure i haven't thought this through sufficiently, haha! thankfully wes says it's a no-go.
most of all, i would love to take a trip up to st. james to spend a good chunk of time with my mom and brother (preferably with wes and my sister there too). i miss them a lot, and i miss the dogs and the farm and everything.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
fun day off in springfield
now i remember why we rarely go to springfield any more; it is exhausting. there are just too many people crawling all over the whole city. but, we need to shop at least a few times a year so we went today for fun. i think it is the first day off wes and i have had together in about 5 months. we do get to spend several hours each day together before we go to work though. but still, it was fun to go on an outing although we basically had to force ourselves to go (staying home seemed so much more appealing!)
we got lunch and shopped....one of my favorite stores is entertainmart (cds, movies, games) so we spent a good deal of time there. i came away with 4 cds i've desperately wanted, and wes got 3. also made the requisite trip to best buy and a few other places.
wes is playing guitar right now. he pretty much never plays any more, which is why it's a big deal to me that he's playing. i'm not sure why he doesn't play as much. he saw a guitar at best buy that he said he wished they made back when he bought all of his....and i think that got him going. i've missed his playing :)
back to work tomorrow! weird schedule this week. that's why i was off work today; normally my days off are wednesday and thursday. but some variety is nice.
we got lunch and shopped....one of my favorite stores is entertainmart (cds, movies, games) so we spent a good deal of time there. i came away with 4 cds i've desperately wanted, and wes got 3. also made the requisite trip to best buy and a few other places.
wes is playing guitar right now. he pretty much never plays any more, which is why it's a big deal to me that he's playing. i'm not sure why he doesn't play as much. he saw a guitar at best buy that he said he wished they made back when he bought all of his....and i think that got him going. i've missed his playing :)
back to work tomorrow! weird schedule this week. that's why i was off work today; normally my days off are wednesday and thursday. but some variety is nice.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
non-descript odds and ends
i've been trying to get myself blogging lately, so i'm going to type a list of little things that are going on with me. there's really nothing major to report, but i think it's good for a person to assess the events of their life and take a step back, organize, and look at the sum-total for some perspective. i'm not an organized person, so this is difficult for me.
* i feel very physically fit. moreso than any other time in my life. i'm by no means an athletic person, and i guess that's why it's a big deal to me. i still run into things like a moron and there's no cure for that, but i've got muscles too:) although my old job at mcdonald's was physically exhausting, i think it was even moreso mentally exhausting and so i was unable to do much activity beyond riding my bicycle to and from work. (which was nothing to sneeze at) nowadays, i ride my bike 1.6 miles to work but i don't ride it home. and i insist on riding it for my mental and physical state, not for transportation. my current job at the deli (while it has NO shortage of drama) is not as emotionally abusive as the old one. plus, it is really tough physical work. which is cathartic to me. i feel a definite sense of fulfillment from being utterly worn out when i go home each night after a job well done. every inch of that deli is spotless, and it's because i am one of two people who clean it every night. in addition, i'm able to walk and jog quite often on my days off and several workdays too. nothing major, but it's amazing to me to be able to do these things and not have them turn into anything compulsive or self-destructive. i have and will always have a lot of social anxieties, but i feel a lot more free when i am active and not reclusive (although i desperately feel like i need to hide under a rock most of the time.)
* i feel deeply affected by bethany's happy ending to her pregnancy. i know little about the subject of babies, though i've done a lot of curious learning on it the past couple of years. i wish i could know every little detail of her experience!
* my wesley has worked full time + since he was 16 years old (he didn't get much sleep his last years of high school). he has sleeping problems to the point that i'm sure it's a major disorder of some sort. at the beginning of this year (due to cutbacks at his job) he got to change to a 3pm to 11pm shift, so he is able to sleep several good hours during the night time, which has helped tremendously. i have begged him to cut back on the tylenol pm he takes. he has taken a large dose every single day for probably 10 years. that's bad. really REALLY bad. and of course, the alternative (not sleeping at all) was worse for most of those years. but now, i'm confident that he could sleep so i've been seriously begging him to stop taking it. he actually cut down to only one pill, which means a lot to me because in other aspects of life, he his quick to be opposed to anything i suggest just because i am the one who suggests it :p well, he has officially run out of pills. i am the one who does the shopping, usually at 11pm when i get off work and he waits outside due to his deep loathing of walmart. so he has probably entered walmart about 4 times since i started working there---all to buy his perscription since i can't buy it for him. so i have said i am not going to buy him any more tylenol pm. if he wants to go in the store and buy it, he can (though i will continue to lecture about liver disease)...but i am probably not going to buy it for him.
* WHY IS IT SO HARD TO FIND KHAKI PANTS TO BUY ONLINE?!?!?! i'm beyond frustrated at this. and while i wear a size long or tall, i've even looked at the regular sizes and STILL can't find any that aren't 40 dollar-ish. i don't buy things full price. sitting here, outstretched wallet, eager to buy some work pants, and can't find any. i guess it's just good timing on my part. a few months ago there were plenty but i wasn't looking to buy. mine get worn out pretty quickly, same goes for shoes as they get soaked every night.
* love the ps3 game FAT PRINCESS. very fun. really clever. also, i like wes' RPG demons souls, although i don't play it as much as he does. still not as good as elder scrolls oblivion in my book, but hopefully in a few more years there will be another elder scrolls game for me to play.
* very much wanting to buy a lot of music. listening to a lot of wilco lately ( a ghost is born), and also elliott smith. i get a good fix of the albums i don't have from pandora.com (your very own free internet radio! everyone should try it) but it just leads me to new discoveries and then i become obsessed with THOSE artist's complete discographies. example: jose gonzalez. found via my elliott smith radio station. currently in my 3 page amazon cart :p i've been meaning to listen to iron and wine for about 5 years now, and now i've gotten a taste and i'm hooked. i guess i may have to treat myself to some music instead of 40 dollar, ill-fitting pants (plus $10 shipping...grr!)
* i feel very physically fit. moreso than any other time in my life. i'm by no means an athletic person, and i guess that's why it's a big deal to me. i still run into things like a moron and there's no cure for that, but i've got muscles too:) although my old job at mcdonald's was physically exhausting, i think it was even moreso mentally exhausting and so i was unable to do much activity beyond riding my bicycle to and from work. (which was nothing to sneeze at) nowadays, i ride my bike 1.6 miles to work but i don't ride it home. and i insist on riding it for my mental and physical state, not for transportation. my current job at the deli (while it has NO shortage of drama) is not as emotionally abusive as the old one. plus, it is really tough physical work. which is cathartic to me. i feel a definite sense of fulfillment from being utterly worn out when i go home each night after a job well done. every inch of that deli is spotless, and it's because i am one of two people who clean it every night. in addition, i'm able to walk and jog quite often on my days off and several workdays too. nothing major, but it's amazing to me to be able to do these things and not have them turn into anything compulsive or self-destructive. i have and will always have a lot of social anxieties, but i feel a lot more free when i am active and not reclusive (although i desperately feel like i need to hide under a rock most of the time.)
* i feel deeply affected by bethany's happy ending to her pregnancy. i know little about the subject of babies, though i've done a lot of curious learning on it the past couple of years. i wish i could know every little detail of her experience!
* my wesley has worked full time + since he was 16 years old (he didn't get much sleep his last years of high school). he has sleeping problems to the point that i'm sure it's a major disorder of some sort. at the beginning of this year (due to cutbacks at his job) he got to change to a 3pm to 11pm shift, so he is able to sleep several good hours during the night time, which has helped tremendously. i have begged him to cut back on the tylenol pm he takes. he has taken a large dose every single day for probably 10 years. that's bad. really REALLY bad. and of course, the alternative (not sleeping at all) was worse for most of those years. but now, i'm confident that he could sleep so i've been seriously begging him to stop taking it. he actually cut down to only one pill, which means a lot to me because in other aspects of life, he his quick to be opposed to anything i suggest just because i am the one who suggests it :p well, he has officially run out of pills. i am the one who does the shopping, usually at 11pm when i get off work and he waits outside due to his deep loathing of walmart. so he has probably entered walmart about 4 times since i started working there---all to buy his perscription since i can't buy it for him. so i have said i am not going to buy him any more tylenol pm. if he wants to go in the store and buy it, he can (though i will continue to lecture about liver disease)...but i am probably not going to buy it for him.
* WHY IS IT SO HARD TO FIND KHAKI PANTS TO BUY ONLINE?!?!?! i'm beyond frustrated at this. and while i wear a size long or tall, i've even looked at the regular sizes and STILL can't find any that aren't 40 dollar-ish. i don't buy things full price. sitting here, outstretched wallet, eager to buy some work pants, and can't find any. i guess it's just good timing on my part. a few months ago there were plenty but i wasn't looking to buy. mine get worn out pretty quickly, same goes for shoes as they get soaked every night.
* love the ps3 game FAT PRINCESS. very fun. really clever. also, i like wes' RPG demons souls, although i don't play it as much as he does. still not as good as elder scrolls oblivion in my book, but hopefully in a few more years there will be another elder scrolls game for me to play.
* very much wanting to buy a lot of music. listening to a lot of wilco lately ( a ghost is born), and also elliott smith. i get a good fix of the albums i don't have from pandora.com (your very own free internet radio! everyone should try it) but it just leads me to new discoveries and then i become obsessed with THOSE artist's complete discographies. example: jose gonzalez. found via my elliott smith radio station. currently in my 3 page amazon cart :p i've been meaning to listen to iron and wine for about 5 years now, and now i've gotten a taste and i'm hooked. i guess i may have to treat myself to some music instead of 40 dollar, ill-fitting pants (plus $10 shipping...grr!)
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